Motherhood… people talk about the love that you will feel for your child before you become a mother and you can cognitively listen to them and try to understand, but there really is an inability to approximate that until your child comes into your life and that is a huge thing that I’ve now realized after becoming a mother. The carefreeness with which I lived my life before I had my child is gone, I will never get that back and by that I mean: I wasn’t prepared for the extent of the fear that would come with being a mother, so I’ve heard people say that it’s like your heart walking around on the outside of your body and it really is like that. You don’t have the same fear for yourself, or for anyone else that you’ve loved before that point in time. Somebody else also said to me that the love that you have for your child can only flow downhill. I didn’t really understand what that meant before I had my child and how I understand it now, is that my child will never understand the enormity and the extent of the love that I have for him, and because of the breadth and depth of that, it flows downhill. It can’t flow uphill.
