Hello everyone, my name is Nomfundo Msomi and the advice I would like to give women and mothers in South Africa is that; we spend so much time regretting, crying, resenting the journey of being mothers due to our circumstances that we face but we forget that we are powerful beings…
Yes, it was 39 years ago and my mom was not married then and it was always known with the nurses at that time, they’re very strict with young girls who had kids when they were still single and when it was time for them to deliver the kids at the ward…
The reason why I chose her name is because I was happy to have her so that is why I said Sinovuyo because of the support of the family; my family was supportive, my sisters, my brothers and my mother were supporting me.
I have learned that to raise the child is not only for the mother – the father also needs a chance to raise the children because there was one instance, we had a quarrel with my husband and then my daughter wrote a letter that said “Mom can you please give me my father the last chance?”
The regret that I have… when it came to Cape Town. I finished my matric and then I came to Cape Town. I came here to study but I didn’t apply early, so I have to take a gap year and then during that gap year I met someone, and I fell pregnant.
Who has been the kindness to me as a mother, is my sister. She’s the most amazing sister ever that I have. She was helpful since, since I was in labour, I remember I went straight to the hospital and my sister came after, and she was the one that was rubbing my back through the pains…
For me it’s that like mothers can support each other, which means they can meet, like find that space of their own mothers and come together and talk about what each mother needs and what each mother – where she feels like she doesn’t get enough of how can we come together and support each other
The person who has been the kindest to me in my motherhood journey was my mother because when I was in labor, I couldn’t give birth, I was still in labor.
Motherhood… people talk about the love that you will feel for your child before you become a mother and you can cognitively listen to them and try to understand, but there really is an inability to approximate that until your child comes into your life and that is a huge thing that I’ve now realized after becoming a mother.
I think I wish that… before I became a mom, my fellow mothers and friends, who already had children, would have pulled me aside and given me permission to not enjoy every minute of the journey of motherhood.